


in the myriad of wishful thinking

by sparklyskie



Series: #AtsuhinaWeek2020 [2]
Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Alternate Universe - Reincarnation, Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Established Relationship, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-16
Updated: 2020-06-16
Packaged: 2021-03-04 03:00:02
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,407
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24746467
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sparklyskie/pseuds/sparklyskie
Summary: And maybe he could find something, anything that took the form of absolute best almost, and he could finally go to sleep knowing that almost is not oppression.
Relationships: Akaashi Keiji/Miya Osamu, Hinata Shouyou/Miya Atsumu, Hinata Shouyou/Miya Osamu
Series: #AtsuhinaWeek2020 [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1780009
Kudos: 25





	in the myriad of wishful thinking

**Author's Note:**

> I sincerely thank [bakugogoo](https://twitter.com/bakugogoo) for beta-reading this ;_; man i love you so much. I apologize if some words aren't properly used since English is not my first language. Enjoy!
> 
> Day 2 - Soulmates

“I don’t do romance.”

“Oh, I'm sure you don’t.”

It felt almost real, almost familiar, and a few almosts that barely met his desire. How many times did Hinata have to say it? It was as if he tried to remember the taste of his favorite candy and he savored everything that he thought would fit. So at least it'd fulfill the void that accepts every bit of its despite. _So it'd fulfill whatever that had slipped away but was still able to hug his heart this tight_.

How almost always felt so utterly devastating.

“Ya don't trust me?”

“I do.”

His smile reminded Hinata of the bravery of the ocean and how cheeky its wave tidal could motion. Being careless once and he'd be swept down his feet easily. But he was willing to take the chance, to taste the flavor of each almost, to chase down what was left for him to the edge of the universe. And maybe he could find something, anything that took the form of absolute best almost, and he could finally go to sleep knowing that almost is not oppression.

Atsumu said he didn't do romance, but his eyes looked like he knew ways of the world and if they jerked the steering wheel he'd find himself wandering in the road that stores endless wonders. Hinata pondered if he could find what his heart wants if they decided to do that.

"I hafta twin," he exclaimed.

"Identical?"

"Almost." Hinata chuckled.

"Ain't quite as charmin' tho'."

"You're funny." and flirty.

and pretty, and chirpy, and still not enough.

Perhaps he was not because he too looked like swirling chaos that twists the ground and makes the sky fall, and Hinata was a glistening sun that burns the littlest drop of water and still longed for a life company. A storm and a star weren't meant to hold hands and wander in the road that stores endless wonders. Mixing the two would result in indescribable disasters.

They talked and talked in a car that Atsumu named after a mule deer Bambi, strolling down the city until dusk kissed the moon goodnight and it was time to go home. Atsumu apologized for not driving Hinata home as he reasoned that there were still errands to run with his brother. So he took his leave and walked away from Atsumu's car to fetch a bus nearby. Hinata glanced from his back, at Atsumu's broad shoulders that looked like they could carry the weight of the world, and he couldn't help but think that maybe they could carry away a little bit of his misery too.

“See ya tomorrow, Shoyou-kun!” Atsumu waved from his car.

“See you, Atsumu-san!” Hinata waved back.

Hinata turned around, ready to welcome another routine as the time suddenly stopped in his feet.

The world went breathlessly silent and his sight pursued to the man whose expression was as vivid as a painting, whose presence uncovered thousand tales of love that takes place in a broad daylight where birds were singing and chirping ever so blissfully. Hinata could recognize the same mischievous irises that could easily swipe him down his feet; the same eyes that told him that if his other half was a thunderstorm that devours limitlessly, then his blaze was more willing to wait until it knows what it is facing. Though he knew it was just as merciless.

The said man gave out a voice that sounded like homesickness and it tore the air around them. _There he is –_

“’Tsumu!”

_\- my sanctuary._

Hinata was ready to grasp and hold the uncertainty in his hands, to once again roll the dice and conclusively taste the luxury of the most awaited liberty; to be freed of prolonged cruelty and is finally able to exploit every sheer of flavors which almosts could never provide him until he coveted the need to swallow an ocean inside of him.

There he was, the very person that finally felt _right_ , wore a ring that belonged to somebody else.

Hinata could see, though rather vaguely, the red string of fate that was no longer connecting the both of them; a fresh cut that smelled like regrets and sorrow and it longed for a new start. _please_ , he pleaded the divine. _please please give me another chance. i promise i’ll look for better_.

“Oh? 'Samu! Whatcha doin’ there?” a voice from Hinata’s back soared.

Afterward, things happened pretty quickly Hinata felt like he had practically detached from reality. Atsumu gave off his car, walking towards his twin whose face had shown no indication of any pleasure of meeting him. Hinata was still within their range, thus Atsumu introduced him to his twin and vice versa, and he learned that they were basically of the same tempest but Osamu stood reluctantly only seconds’ miles behind.

“Where’s Keiji-kun?” Atsumu asked.

“Caught a bus just moments ago. Said gotta do somethin’ ‘bout ‘pproaching deadlines.”

“Poor soul.”

“I agree.” Osamu smiled rather sadly.

The moment the corners of his mouth turned up a little bit quirkier, Hinata knew that his repressed curiosity wished to acknowledge other emotions that would stir up the features of his face. He’d like to voluntarily stand longer only to know if his name would roll differently in his tongue, or if his nose would scrunch up once he got a sniff of his favorite meal. But there was a bizarre tingling in the back of his mind that told him that he didn’t need proof to satisfy every inch of his inquisitiveness; that he remembered every strand of hair and his hands had traced the map of scars on his body.

Atsumu stood cladding him, intending to wave another goodbye. “Well, Shouyou-kun, I guess we’ll head home first.”

_no wait_ , his heart beseeched of pure sincerity.

Hinata’s eyes hadn’t once left Osamu’s. He’d spent his entire life behind walking on a thin ice that he knew would break and drown him eventually. His soul had been searching in a tenacious journey and his heart was weary. He’d always wanted to give in, to let the growing despair inside of him embrace and engulf him whole until his sensibility was nibbled and there was nothing to offer anymore. He yearned for someone to hold his greedy and disgruntled heart gently because they were two of his most despised fragments of himself.

He wanted him to be his salvation.

_stay, -_

It was a mere act of friendliness, of courtesy that lingered in a body of a man, of showing that he too approved of their relationship or whatever that was going on between Hinata and Atsumu, of the spring of Hinata’s and Osamu’s novelty friendship. Osamu high-fived him, and part of Hinata wanted to clutch the warmth and withstand of letting him go. Yet time didn’t stop for them, and they walked past him like it was just another day of the year, of another page that ought to be turned because it was already over.

_\- would you?_

Hinata cast a glance at the sceneries outside the window as he took off with the bus. The streets were busy with folks rushing home where dinner and family members impatiently waited for them, and fatigue piled and they only dreamed of a bed to rest on the top of it. Hinata slumped down into his seat as he watched the night went by like a flashlight.

In the myriad of wishful thinking, of people and city lights, his heart settled that the concept of soul mates was probably as indisputably fictitious as it is of Santa Clauses.

***

_It was back in the days where men and women would sit by the seashore and sing against the summer breeze, where the white sand would muffle and tickle their feet playfully as they chase one another in a game that leaves the whole world behind their footprint. It was the days of fusion, of foxes and crows and supernatural beings, of oddity that speaks beyond the realm of truth._

_They were young and foolish, raging blood that makes the sea crawls its way back to the void. And they were hostile of the will of the stars, of how the cold, unforgiving snow witnessed the repetitious tragedy that seemed to happily befall them—two hearts that immensely stretched out for each other and wished to love ordinarily._

_It was at the beginning of things, of days of innocence,_

_of grieves._

**Author's Note:**

> I want to thank [Shinku_Tsuuki](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Shinku_Tsuuki/pseuds/Shinku_Tsuuki) for letting me borrow her story [Mr. Guardian](https://archiveofourown.org/works/12885813/chapters/29436762) that'd serve as the past life to these characters :) If you understand Bahasa Indonesia please kindly check out her osahina story! (and suffer in this rare pair hell with me) Her works are so amazing jshss thank you so much ampazman :( <3 But if you don't, here's a snippet of what happened to their past [It's (Not) The Snow's Fault](https://archiveofourown.org/works/17249786).
> 
> Kudos/comments are appreciated! :D
> 
> Thank you for reading this <3


End file.
